Why You Dread Being Bored
Our modern society keeps us hustling: from work to parenting to errands to all kinds of activities. We’re taught that there is value in keeping busy, that being productive should be celebrated. We also are constantly bombarded online with content that highlights people having it all together, going on their next vacation, workout out at 5:00 a.m., or getting a promotion. You feel you have to keep doing to keep up!
And being busy can be a coping mechanism too.
There are a number of reasons you might keep adding to your to do list. First, keeping your mind constantly focused on what you have to do next stops you from having any space to think. It becomes an avoidance tactic that keeps you from feeling or thinking about what you don’t want to. Ever notice when the chaos of the day ends—driving home from work or after the kids are in bed—you end up reaching for food? That’s because constantly being busy is an avoidance tactic just like emotional eating. You can rely on food when your day is winding down.
It is also common that those who tend to be anxious prefer to stay preoccupied with the next thing and the next and the next… Because it gives a level of predictability, a feeling of control, over their life.
But neither of these approaches support your long-term wellbeing. You might notice you start to experience physical aches, less quality sleep, or even a shorter temper by trying to do it all. Plus: it is impossible to predict life, so total control is not something completely in our hands.
Getting comfortable with the idea of rest and free time is an important part of looking after your mental health. If the above sounds like you, know that you don’t have to spend hours alone or in the quiet! Try something small like:
- A great way to create predictability is with routines, structure, and rituals which can take the overthinking out of the equation. This can look like finding repeatable times in your day or weeks where you can turn off some or all of your technology notifications.
- Don’t reach for your phone as soon as you wake up. Read, journal, take a longer shower, stretch, whatever helps you tune inward.
- Step away from your desk over the lunch hour and do something for you. Go for a walk, sit in the sunshine, take a few deep breaths before returning to technology and your coworkers.
- Swap out mindless phone scrolling with a new craft project or hobby.
Many of you have very busy lives and can only find a few moments here and there, but don’t use busyness as an excuse to ignore your own wants and needs. You might find yourself able to be more present and enjoy where you’re at instead of worrying about the past or future. Learning to sit with the good times builds resilience for when life throws you a curveball in the future (life has its ups and downs!).
💛 Your peace awaits.
